Spring 2013

I cannot believe Shine 2013 is right around the corner! I am so beyond blessed to be leading it this year, and so slightly stressed as well. We have accepted 27 students so far and I am still sending out applications. We will be at our limit this year, and its so awesome! Please continue to pray for the Seminar as we will be super busy and I'm sure at times overwhelmed. Pray for students to really grasp the understanding that the solution and focal point to everything we do is Jesus. Always is, always will be.

Something I am so blessed with is a friend of mine with the Mallorca, Spain CCBC invited me to join in with their retreat on the beautiful beach this weekend. No internet or distractions, only Jesus, fellowship, worship, the word, and sun. I am so looking forward to this! I have missed CCBC so much, it will be so nice to study the Word with them again! I am kind of anxious because the dates are so close to Shine, but I really feel God saying to go, and my wonderful team supports me in this too. So I am choosing not to worry and just enjoy Jesus before all the crazy things start to pile on!

I want to share a story that happened a few days ago. I had lunch with some of the ladies from Not For Sale. NFS has a business called Home soup where we go window to window and sell healthy, organic soup to the ladies here in the RLD. NFS also has a program with victims of human trafficking in teaching them how to make the soup that we sell. A couple of them were at the lunch table with us. One of the victims is pregnant. It was her birthday or something and some of the team had gotten her a sweet gift of some lotion and girly smelling things. Her reaction moved my heart greatly. Before she even opened it she started to cry and thank us. The tears started to flow as she held the gifts close to her. She just kept repeating "Thank you, thank you! God bless you!" Her joy and tears were so tender. Naturally, while observing this, emotions began to rise up. Not just joy, warmth, and love for this sweet, sweet woman, but also fury. How could someone harm a beautiful lady like this? I really try to see the best in everyone here. Knowing that the Lord is jealous for each and every one of them. Whether they be clients or pimps. Prostitutes or tourists. Jesus longs for them. But there in that moment humanity really disappointed me. No disappointed doesn't even come close. They disgusted me. I was so appalled. Usually when we hear stories, we try to not dwell on the details, as many times some stories are too overwhelming, resulting in secondary trauma. So because of this, I think sometimes the realization that we humans have fallen SO far hits me like a ton of bricks. It was very intense. Thankfully, the emotion left as quick as it came and I was able to think straight. But did I realize just how much grace we really need to work in this area. Please continue to pray for us, for our team, for our community, for our ministry.

All I hath needed Thy hand hath provided

I absolutely love hymns. They are deep and rich. Nothing watered down or repetitive about them. One of my favorites is "Great is Thy Faithfulness"

Great is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father;

There is no shadow of turning with Thee,

Thou changest not, Thy compassions they fail not,

As Thou hast been, Thou forever wilt be.

Great is Thy faithfulness!

Great is Thy faithfulness!

Morning by morning new mercies I see

All I have needed Thy hand hath provided

Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me!

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest,

Sun, moon, and stars in their courses above;

Join with all nature in manifold witness,

To Thy great faithfulness, mercy, and love.

Great is Thy faithfulness!

Great is Thy faithfulness!

Morning by morning new mercies I see

All I have needed Thy hand hath provided

Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me!

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth,

Thine own great presence to cheer and to guide;

Strength for today, and bright hope for tomorrow

Blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside.

Obviously, pointing out that my favorite line is stated several times above. I am amazed at God. He called me here to Amsterdam and told me He would provide. I stand here doubtful at times but truly EVERYTHING I have need He has provided. In so many ways too, some though hairdressing, others through wonderful people who support me. He takes care of me. I will never look back and think "oh man, I didn't have much money at all" I will look back and see how I had only 25 yet could pay 50. What's exciting is this is only the very beginning to an incredible life lived for God. I look forward to the things to come.

This never-ending learning circle

2012 brought a lot of insight and life lessons.

I learned how to live a full year in another country.

I learned that when God speaks to us; its important not to interpret it into what we think it means.

I learned that the last 5 years of leading up to living in Amsterdam didn't prepare me for actually living in Amsterdam nor to what the Lord had called of me here.

I learned that Amsterdam was just "my starting place" that I would pioneer here but this is only the beginning to my life and calling.

I learned how to submit to authority even more, and to stand up when I know something is not right.

I learned what it felt like to turn quarter of a century old.

I learned how to open my heart up.

I learned a richer meaning behind the verse "The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart..." (Psalms 34:18)

I learned there is a time for following and a time for leading.

I learned that with becoming a leader comes much responsibility.

I learned how to simplify living in the physical, intellectual, and spiritual.

2013 has also brought some insight in just a month.

I learned how important it is to be centered on His Word and truth, on the Scripture and not our interpretation of the Scripture.

I learned the importance of being a promoter of the truth and in teaching it in an expository way.

I learned how much God provided for me in the last year. As I did all my expense reports, I realized how much extra money I had to spend when I couldn't account where it came from.

Of course these things that I have "learned" I have not mastered. But there is grace in my humanity.

I want to leave you with a testimony of God's love and grace. It's a story about a woman here. Lets call her "Tamar." Tamar had always believed in God, but like a common misconception never wanted to pray with us when we would go to the windows because "one cannot pray to God in this place of work." But every week our team said hello and reminded her how much Jesus loves her. Finally, she had had enough and when the gospel was shared one night she gave her life to Christ right there behind the window. When I first heard this I thought, alright, well we'll see how it unfolds. Will anything change in her life? And if so how long will it take? I can fully say I got to see Jesus work through someone's life wholeheartedly and meaningfully. It was nothing we did, it was all because of the Holy Spirit. We gave her a Bible and she was so hungry within a day or so had read through the Old Testament. She loves to read it and she loves to pray! Not two weeks later she made the choice to quit working as a prostitute. She knew it was wrong and had had enough, she just couldn't do it anymore. A few days later she had some of our team over to her house for dinner. This is when I got to actually meet her, and oh she is so precious. From her actions that unfolded this past month I know without a doubt her conversion was so sweet and sincere. Yesterday she joined in at my wonderful church here and I got to talk deeper with her. She said whenever she reads the Word of God she just weeps, and can't stop. I told her the difference between Judas feeling regret and Peter repenting was the tears Peter wept bitterly. Tears are a great thing. The incredible thing, is she is understanding things because the Holy Spirit speaks to her. She is hungry and can't get enough of the Word. She truly wants to live a pure life for the Lord and has such a healthy understanding of right and wrong and is learning grace, it's inspiring and beautiful. Jesus is so wonderful and I am so thankful to be here.

A few things you can pray for:

-It looks like I got accepted for my visa for the next year (PTL right?!) but have to pay for it at the end of the month, please pray that God would provide.

-This year holds some awesome but scary leadership roles for me, including leading the Shine Seminar in April, please pray for wisdom and grace.

-My 2 year commitment ends with YWAM Amsterdam in December, but I want to really know what His next plan is for me. Whether I stay here or move somewhere else, please pray for wisdom in that decision (yes I know its 11 months away but its something I want to start preparing for early).

-I really don't like bringing up finances, and God truly has provided for my every need so far, but there have been some ministry trips and outreaches I haven't been able to do, due to lack of finances, that I really wanted to be apart of last year. This request is ONLY if the Lord has been putting it on your heart to support me not only by praying for me but financially as well. If so you can click the "donate" button to the right, or email me Katybestill@gmail.com if you would like to get a tax write off through supporting me.

Thank you to my constant prayer supporters, it makes the biggest difference here because of you!

Shine // Latvia // Germany

Well, it is decided. I am the official Shine Seminar 2013 Leader. I couldn't be more thrilled and terrified at the same time. For those of you who do not know, Shine is our 6 week course on the global sex trade and how we as Christians can response. It's pretty much a training for those who are interested in working with those in prostitution or have been trafficked. Modern day slavery still exists, and it's closer than we realize. We just want to play a small part in working to end it. This will be our 3rd year doing this seminar. We really have a desire to take it from Amsterdam and bring it all over the world. My life is about to get even more busy, but I am so excited. If you are interested in partaking in Shine email me at Shine@ywam.nl and I will send you an application (that I just spent several hours creating mind you :) The dates are April 18th to June 3rd.

And going to the next topic, Latvia was really amazing. We have a sister ministry in Riga, called Freedom 61. They are a small team that reaches out to the street ladies there who are working in prostitution. Almost all of them are addicted to drugs. They also do prevention work in schools and orphanages as Latvia is considered a Source country. In regards to trafficking humans, you have 3 different types of countries:

1: Source Countries: from which people are trafficked out of

2: Transit Countries: a temporary stop, momentary exchange

3: Destination Countries: where the victims end up (Amsterdam is considered a Destination Country)

So prevention work is pretty important in these Source Countries. But while we (myself and the 3 lovely volunteers we have had here in Amsterdam for 3 months from IHOP) were there, we taught about intercession, interceded, as well as did some outreach to the ladies. I brought my scissors with me and did some haircuts. It was awesome to be able to use a physical skill the Lord has given me. It even brought in some ladies who have never come into their cafe before. Oh to explain, they have a cozy room in the middle of the "Red Light District" there, where they offer a warm place for the girls to sit, have some coffee & tea or soup or just a conversation. Or while I was there, a haircut. It snowed while we were there so someplace warm is nice. The last client I had, had never come into their cafe before. And while I was running my hands through her hair, she opened up about her life story. How she had been trafficked and bought and sold. They got to build a relationship with her, and I pray it grows. The cafe was also where many would meet in the underground Church during the Soviet Union. So amazing!

Doing work!

The team that went to Latvia

Part of Freedom 61

Traditional Latvian Food!

Lastly, my colleague and I went to Germany to teach at a DTS on Justice. I was SO stressed out, but guess what? Everything came together and worked out! My friend and I split the week in half and really tagged teamed all there is about Justice and the Word of God. It was a wonderful experience. Got to see some old friends, meet some new ones, pray for the students, showed Nefarious, and taught from the Word of God. Oh and Köln is such a beautiful city. We spent one afternoon checking out the Love Lock Bridge (Hohenzollern Bridge) the old Cathedral (Dom) and eating really delicious German cake. There are never any complaints when it comes to German cake. But truly, it was an awesome week.

Els and I on the train to Köln

Seeing Rahel at the train station!

Hohenzollern Bridge

                                                                                 The Dom Cathedral

                                     
Oh! And so I just ended up taking my severely broken bike to my Croatian bike fixing buddies and just told them I will spent the large cost in replacing the parts. He called me a few days later saying that he could not replace the parts (because its such an old bike and hard to find them) but he somehow fixed the problem and only charged me 25€! It was such a relief and a blessing. I am SO thankful to have a bike again!

On the train to and from.

I had the privilege of teaching with my colleague in Köln, Germany for this past week on the topic of Justice. When I found out I would be speaking, it got me excited, because I knew that in the midst of my studies I would gain much knowledge as well. We broke the week up and my topic would be "The Biblical Foundation of Justice." If anyone knows me they know how much I love scripture. I love to study the Word of God. I love to decipher every single word and compare it with other verses. I became quite frustrated because I was opening up a can that would take me months if not years to study. But I had only a certain amount of time and I had to come up with something. Many days my attempts to start my notes wouldn't even begin because I would get so caught up in what I was learning.  But I got most of what I wanted to say onto paper and the week went pretty smooth. What I did get out of this teaching though was Jesus's heart for injustice. I don't work in these issues because its the "next cool thing to do," I work with them because thats what Jesus did. And I long to lead a life after His. The first recording of Jesus speaking publicly; He proclaims Isaiah 61:1 and part of 2. That is His heart, that was His mission. My mission is to point others to that place of being justified before Christ. I don't just want to see broken men and women set free physically, I want to see them set free spiritually. Working with justice issues is much bigger than seeking to abolish human trafficking, its seeking to see one justified before the Righteous Judge. When we reach out to these girls its not just seeing that they are taken care of physically but longing to see they are taken care of spiritually as well. It's easy to get so caught up in our physical work and forget the heart behind it, forget Whose heart is behind it.

Also I want to really make it a point to say that I don't do any of this work for myself. Truly, I don't. It doesn't make me feel better for "doing good" nor do I take my identity in my work. I love because He loved me first. I can love only because He first loved me, and the reason why I love is because He first love me. Anything I do is for God, not to please myself or make me feel better.

On a side note, me and a few others from our team is going to Latvia on Tuesday til Saturday to visit and encourage our sister ministry, Freedom 61. I look forward to this and so do my scissors and comb. Latvia is a very interesting place, I would truly welcome your prayers. And my life in Amsterdam is still up and running. Always busy. I really do love this city.

Some practical things you can be praying for:

I recently reapplied for my visa, so pray that I can afford the fee and that it gets approved.

And my bike seems to be completely dead, and I need another one greatly, but finding a reliable, working one that is my size and in my price range has been more difficult that I thought it would.

I think that is it for now, thank you to everyone who does hold me up in prayer, it is so greatly appreciated.

Back to the heart of the city

Well, I had a wonderful, interesting, growing, painful time back in America. But gold has got to go through fire to be refined. I got to go home (San Diego) for a month. To be honest it was such a emotionally intense time that I haven't been able to really write about it yet, for I have spent this week contemplating it. But when am I not contemplating life? haha. It was so wonderful to see my family and friends. My little nieces and nephew are getting so big and so beautiful it hurts, literally. That was something I understood about serving the Lord abroad, it comes with sacrifice. I have to sacrifice being apart of watching my sweet young family grow up. I know it will be worth it, but for now it's hard. So I got as many hugs and kisses in as I could. They truly warm my heart. It was also wonderful because my mom and best friend threw me a Birthday party and it was perfect. I had a slight fear of turning 25 but I now feel like this new season it brings me is going to be a great one. I have such incredible family and friends, truly I am amazing at how blessed I am. The difficult time has definitely happened for good but it was still hard to live through. I experienced so many emotions at once it was almost too much to handle. The overwhelming understanding that I was leaving home again, the fear that came with turning 25, the realness of the work I was getting back into, the memory of the spiritual atmosphere of Amsterdam, getting my heart broken, leaving my sweet little ones to grow another year without me there... just so many extreme emotions showered over me at once and it was hard to trust the Lord's plan. But it's those moments when you experience just how wonderful your parents, friends and family are. They love you and pray for you and let you lean upon them when you can't walk on your own. I needed them and they were there for me. I also realized how much I needed Jesus. I couldn't survive without Him. It had been a long while since I had experienced that, and it was crucial for me so that I could put an end to this old season of my life and move into my new one. I have longed for this old season of walking in the wilderness to be behind me and I am so joyful that there is now so much light in my once cloudy sky. After crying my heart out for a few days I had a wonderful, intimate moment with God. He spoke so clearly about personal things I needed to hear and I have not wept since that Wednesday morning. I know I have a beautiful road ahead of me, not only in my Amsterdam season but the season that comes after. I am so thankful I have a God who loves me and cares for me and guides me when I am walking blindly.

This past week has also picked up where I left off with ministry. The girls still remember me and that warms my heart. "Deborah" is supposed to come over to our place tonight for coffee, I look forward to continuing our friendship. Please continue to pray for her, God truly is reaching out to her and I am desiring to be His hands and feet. I also am preparing a teaching for a DTS in Köln, Germany which I will be speaking with my colleague Elisabeth. I am nervous yet excited. I have no idea how to teach about "The Biblical Foundation of Justice" however it's slowly coming to me and the bit that I have so far has been an encouraging learning experience for me already so I hope it will be for them too.

Red Lights Keep on Burning

Why is it the moment I feel inspired to write I have to work in 12 mins? Let's try using these fingers for some fast typing. Tonight I went out with Not For Sale on our weekly "Soup selling" They have a business here that makes homemade, healthy, organic soups and sells to the ladies behind the windows. This has been a great way to continue building relationships with the girls. Because I live in the center of the Red Light District, I get so used to seeing such unnatural things. It starts to become normal. Like for instance, my colleague and I were talking to a girl in the windows. She had just gotten back from vacation and we were chatting about that. She put her usual order in for soup and behind us a man boldly approaches (it's amazing how in this place its not just tolerated but honored for men to buy sex publicly, even their friends support and cheer them on gladly) and asks how much for her service. She jokes around a little but then says "no seriously, its 50€" he says "Alright" throws down his cigarette and moves to step into her room. It was so casual. Just like he had asked her how much a haircut would be or something. I realized how used to that kind of talk I was, I mean I hear it everyday. But tonight it's like my eyes remembered how unnormal this sort of transaction is. Just because you witness it over and over doesn't make it right or civil. I travel home for a month next week and I think it's coming at a perfect time. My roommate/colleague went home to Norway a couple weeks ago. She said it was so interesting driving in a beautiful place where sin and tolerance isn't plastered in every window or in every alley. I know I will be yearning to come back here but truth be told, I am ready for a break.

So my fingers didn't type fast enough, now I am finishing this post the next day. Last night I also walked by a girl's window who i have really good contact with. We will call her Deborah. She and I went for coffee weeks ago and was eager to hear the gospel. We have tried to meet up since but she kept canceling (which is normal) but tonight she was eager to talk and opened up as to why she has been canceling and I was just reminded how amazing and kind she is. She wasn't canceling for her sake, no, she was canceling for mine because she had been going through some heavy things and felt like she "wouldn't be good company." I almost started to cry, i reached out to take her hand and told her how she would NEVER have to worry about that. That I would always love to visit with her no matter how she feels or what she is going through. I also reminded her how much God loves her, and how, contrary to popular belief God's presence is with her, even in the windows. He does not flee from evil, evil flees from Him. It's those moments of being able to love on a girl here who doesn't get much proper love and more often pushes true love away makes living here in this wretched city so worth it.

Another awesome thing that happened on Wednesday, we were bringing coffee and tea to the ladies and one of the girls was sitting down in her room with the curtain closed (most of the windows are connected so you walk into one and see the other) her foot had a horrible cramp and she couldn't stand. My spanish speaking colleague asked if we could pray for her. In the middle of praying she started to almost laugh, when we finished she said the pain was completely gone. The Lord loves these ladies so much, and we just want to help them see that.